Recently I had to apologize on behalf of the male species for sending unsolicited dick pics. It was a sad day, but we all had a laugh in the end at the guy’s expense.
Well now it seems like dudes are messing up again. It’s not like this is news either, I get it we do it on a daily occurrence. This time around, this guy thought it would be a good idea to ask if a girl he had talked to earlier wanted to Netflix and Chill.
The problem is HE knew it was lame, even saying before asking “not to be lame.”
For those of you needing a proper definition of “Netflix and Chill” here it is, and if anyone knows this guy, you might want to send it to him too!
Via Urban Dictionary:
code for two people going to each others houses and f*cking or doing other sexual related acts
Brad: “Hey Julia wanna come over and watch Netflix and chill”
Julia: “Sure I’ll pick up the condoms”
Brad: “Wait I thought we were just gonna watch Netflix and chill?”
Julia: “Netflix and Chill means we f*ck, dumbass”
Okay so the best part of that definition? The dude’s name! It’s Brad, which is who we are talking about going forward. Brad thought this girl was being nice to him, so he thought the next best step was, talking to her to see if she was interested in a consensual relationship.
Haha just kidding that’s definitely not what he did next…
Even if she doesn’t have a boyfriend, isn’t this the universal sentence for all girls that are too nice to say, “Ummm can you delete my number forever you scumbag?” But somehow he didn’t get the hint, because you know…dudes are gonna be dudes.
It’s 2018 and the only reason people are nice in Brad’s mind are because they are down to bone. Yeah chalk up another loss to the male brain. Don’t worry he kept going.
Before we break that down, let’s take a quick live look at Brad’s brain…
Sigh yeah thought so, nothing is going on in there except idiocracy. If you are a guy and you are reading this…people can be nice to you andddd not want to bang. It’s a thing and it’s call being decent humans. Brad must just be used to people being mean to him though if this is what he thought, and I wonder why…
He just had to double check, you know for science or something?
In Brad’s “not to be lame” mind the two things that come before sex are compliments about his music taste and sitting with him at lunch. I think her last text didn’t compute with his lame brain because he basically self-destructed.
Maybe Brad is just a robot programmed to think like a caveman who just learned about Netflix and Chill? Let’s hope that’s the case and not hope he’s a real human.